Rough Days

Lately I've been having a lot of rough days. They aren't bad days, just rough. And sometimes I go through spells like that where I just have a hard time of things. A hard time eating. Tough time feeling confident. Can't find any motivation. Feelings of failure, guilt and throwing myself daily pity parties.

When I feel this way I just want to fix it immediately. Workout once and be skinny. Eat one salad and have energy. Buy new pants and feel more confident. Clean my house, then I'll feel calm. None of that is going to fix my tough times. It takes work, time and honesty with those you are closest to.

Everyone has these days and no matter how many times I tell myself that, it still feels lonely. But I keep on keeping on. Take little actions. Make tiny decisions and you'll get out of the woods eventually. As I'm writing this I'm tying to convince myself to eat my afternoon snack of 15-20 almonds instead of a cookie or another cup of coffee. I also texted my boyfriend when I finished my lunch and he celebrated with me. 

These are some of the things I have been doing the last couple weeks to get myself out of my funk. 

Making Lists

Lists are so helpful when feeling overwhelmed. And let me tell you I make detailed lists when I'm feeling this way. It may take me a couple weeks to complete the list and by that time I'll probably have another list going. But it organizes my overwhelming thoughts in a visual way that makes me feel like it is a surmountable task. 

Meal Prepping

This one is huge for those battling an eating disorder. Eating is enough work as it is and if you have to decide what to eat everyday it just makes the stress so much more. So I plan my lunches and snacks for the week and I double check that I have enough food for a hearty breakfast every morning. 

Planning Trips

This round of rough days I was able to plans and book a couple trips for the future and that helped more then I was expecting it to. So look to the future plans something fun for two weeks from now. It really helped me feel less trapped in my sad, destructive feelings. 

Cleaning 

This one I feel is pretty obvious. But clean something that doesn't get cleaned often. I moved my couch and swept up all the dust. It wasn't a visible change but I felt better knowing it was clean under my couch. 

Have A Cry

And lastly, let yourself cry. Feeling down is hard effing work and you get to be tired and sad. But don't wallow in it. Embrace it. Then stand up tall and congratulate yourself for being strong enough to take your sadness head on. I would also advise to not give in to the temptation to hide your sadness from the ones you love. Let them hold you and grieve with you. They are your loved ones because they freaking love you....let them.